Who's on Right Flank?
Performed by: Sir Zula Darkwillow and Sir Kwartz of Folkestone
Zula: Hey Q, I just talked to Jarrod and he�s going to let me be a General at next years Queen of Hearts.
Place/Gathering : Bardic for Team Sean Aengus, Queen of Hearts Date: 2008 Original by/Sung to: "Who's on First" by Abbot & Castello Q: Look Zula, if you're the General, you must know all the Fighters in the line. Zula: I do. Q: Well you know I've been away for a bit and don�t know the new line set up. So you'll have to tell me their names, and then I'll know who's fighting on the line. Zula: Well, let me see�.. Who's on right flank, What's on left flank, I Don't Know Healing Q: That's what I want to find out. Zula: I say Who's right flank, What�s left flank, I Don't Know's healing. Q: Are you going to be the General? Zula: Yes. Q: You going to be fighting too? Zula: Yes. Q: And you don't know the guys names? Zula: I do. Q: Well then who's on right flank? Zula: Yes. Q: I mean the fellow's name. Zula: Who. Q: The guy on right flank. Zula: Who. Q: The right flank. Zula: Who. Q: The guy fighting... Zula: Who is on right flank! Q: I'm asking YOU who's on right flank. Zula: That's the guy�s name. Q: That's who's name? Zula: Yes. Q: Well go ahead and tell me. Zula: That's it. Q: That's who? Zula: Yes. PAUSE Q: Look, you gotta right flank? Zula: Of course. Q: Who's fighting right flank? Zula: That's right. Q: When you merc out the right flank, who gets the gold? Zula: Every coin of it. Q: All I'm trying to find out is the fellow's name on right flank. Zula: Who. Q: The guy that gets... Zula: That's it. Q: Who gets the gold... Zula: He does, every coin. Sometimes his wife comes down and collects it. Q: Whose wife? Zula: Yes. PAUSE Zula: What's wrong with that? Q: Look, all I wanna know is when you sign up the right flank, how does he sign his name? Zula: Who. Q: The guy. Zula: Who. Q: How does he sign... Zula: That's how he signs it. Q: Who? Zula: Yes. PAUSE Q: All I'm trying to find out is what's the guy's name on right flank. Zula: No. What is on left flank. Q: I'm not asking you who's left flank. Zula: Who's on right flank. Q: One flank at a time! Zula: Well, don't change the fighters around. Q: I'm not changing nobody! Zula: Take it easy, buddy. Q: I'm only asking you, who's the guy on right flank? Zula: That's right. Q: Ok. Zula: All right. PAUSE Q: What's the guy's name on right flank? Zula: No. What is on left flank. Q: I'm not asking you who's on left flank. Zula: Who's on right flank. Q: I don't know. Zula: He's Healing, we're not talking about him. Q: Now how did I get on Healing? Zula: Why you mentioned his name. Q: If I mentioned the Healers name, who did I say is healing? Zula: No. Who's fighting right flank. Q: What's on right flank? Zula: What's on left flank. Q: I don't know. Zula: He's Healing. Q: There I go, back on Healing again! PAUSE Q: Would you just stay on healing and don't go off it. Zula: All right, what do you want to know? Q: Now who's Healing? Zula: Why do you insist on putting Who on healing? Q: What am I putting on healing. Zula: No. What is on left flank. Q: You don't want who on left flank? Zula: Who is on right flank. Q: I don't know. Zula & Q Together: HEALER! PAUSE Q: Look, you gotta pike line? Zula: Sure. Q: The piker's name? Zula: Why. Q: I just thought I'd ask you. Zula: Well, I just thought I'd tell ya. Q: Then tell me who's piking. Zula: Who's fighting right flank. Q: I'm not... stay out of the flanks! I want to know what's the guy's name that�s piking? Zula: No, What is left flank. Q: I'm not asking you who's left flank. Zula: Who's right flank! Q: I don't know. Zula & Q Together: HEALER! PAUSE Q: The piker's name? Zula: Why. Q: Because! Zula: Oh, he's middle shield. PAUSE Q: Look, You gotta Blacksmith on this team? Zula: Sure. Q: The blacksmiths name? Zula: Tomorrow. Q: You don't want to tell me today? Zula: I'm telling you now. Q: Then go ahead. Zula: Tomorrow! Q: What time? Zula: What time what? Q: What time tomorrow are you gonna tell me who's blacksmith? Zula: Now listen. Who is not blacksmith. Q: I'll break your arm, you say who's on right flank! I want to know what's the blacksmith's name? Zula: What's on left flank. Q: I don't know. Zula & Q Together: Healer! PAUSE Q: Gotta a Sorcerer on the line? Zula: Certainly. Q: The sorcerer�s name? Zula: Today. Q: Today, and tomorrow's blacksmith. Zula: Now you've got it. Q: All we got is a couple of days on the line. PAUSE Q: You know I'm a general too. Zula: So they tell me. Q: I get in the line to do some fancy fighting, Tomorrow's the black smith on my line and a heavy hitter team lines up to attack us. Now the heavy hitters advance and hit the line, me, being a good general, I'm gonna move the right flank in. So I move to the right flank and tell who to move? Zula: Now that's the first thing you've said right. Q: I don't even know what I'm talking about! PAUSE Zula: That's all you have to do. Q: Is to tell who on the right flank to move. Zula: Yes! Q: Now who moves? Zula: Naturally. PAUSE Q: Look, if I tell the right flank to move, somebody's gotta move. Now who moves? Zula: Naturally. Q: Who? Zula: Naturally. Q: Naturally? Zula: Naturally. Q: So I yell to Naturally. Zula: No you don't, you yell to Who. Q: Naturally. Zula: That's different. Q: That's what I said. Zula: You're not saying it... Q: I yell to Naturally. Zula: You yell to Who. Q: Naturally. Zula: That's it. Q: That's what I said! Zula: You ask me. Q: I yell to who? Zula: Naturally. Q: Now you ask me. Zula: You yell to Who? Q: Naturally. Zula: That's it. Q: Grrrrrrrrrrr��I give up! Zula: What? Q: I said I give up! Zula: Oh, that's our Seer. |
Created by Faelinn Shadowmoon (Leanne Micciche)
at 08-19-08 03:29 PM
Last Modified by Faelinn Shadowmoon (Leanne Micciche) at 08-19-08 03:33 PM
Last Modified by Faelinn Shadowmoon (Leanne Micciche) at 08-19-08 03:33 PM